Writing Project # 1 Final w/ Suggested Revisions

The first revision would be to choose a better topic. One in which I actually knew a lot more about instead of just the concept (outcome number one and two.) The second revision(s) made would be grammatical changes (outcome number three.) For this specific writing project some of these grammatical changes would be restructuring all passive-voice sentences; removal of all contractions not in quotes; and fixing my commas – the ones that are missing. Overall I did a good job. However, there is definitely room for improvement (outcome number eight.)


Writing Project # 1


The topic being researched is “Voting – an American Right” and the current age requirement. Research will be conducted to conclude whether or not this right should be extended to include those who have a stake in the future of the nation. Research will include documented direct quotes from the U.S. Constitution and Amendments thereafter. Also, research will be compiled regarding whether organizations, such as Kids Voting USA, are demonstrating the ability to affect communities with youth involvement during elections. What would the benefits or disadvantages be to lowering the voting age in America?

The controversy surrounding the issue to lower the voting age is whether or not teenagers, over the age of 16, are mature enough to make well informed decisions. They are allowed to drive vehicles at the age 15-that requires constant 'good' decision making; obtain a job at the age 16-which requires paying taxes; receive permission from parents get married at the age 17 -that requires demonstration of adult responsibility and if convicted of a serious crime be tried as an adult in a court of law prior to turning the age of 18. Teenagers with adult responsibilities and expectations are currently not allowed to vote like an adult.

I was scared to vote when I turned 18, because I didn’t know how or what I was supposed to do. Unfortunately, I dropped out of high school two years before I was to graduate. It’s possible I missed the opportunity to receive formal training regarding voting and its processes. I felt awkward in asking my family and friends for fear of being viewed as incompetent. Finally, in my late 20’s, I gained the courage I needed to ask questions. I overcame my fear by realizing numerous people died to ensure I had the freedom and the right to vote. If I had learned voting wasn’t as complicated as I thought it was earlier, I could have affected changes regarding important issues throughout my life. This experience has led to my desire to learn what I can about voting and to determine if education reform regarding voting and how it’s taught is needed. My focus has changed from education reform to lowering the voting age. If the voting age limit had been 16, I may have had a different voting experience.

The purpose of researching this issue is to educate and inform voters of America that teenagers have the capacity to better the nation’s democracy. Youth in America are smarter than they are given credit for. Research will attempt to include documentation showing teenagers are responsible in various areas (driving, civic participation through Kids Voting USA, addressing governmental officials when requesting to change voting age, etc.) All Americans over the age of 16 will be the targeted audience for this research as the research will affect each of them. This would include those who can vote now and those who will be able to vote in near the future. Teenagers need to know their “voice” counts because the decisions made today will affect them tomorrow, while Adults need to understand that teenagers are becoming smarter with technological advances and better educational programs such as Kids Voting USA. We all should take advantage of these key factors when educating our youth.

The limitation(s) for this research will be of not being able to conduct extensive research, such as surveys or interviews of doctors; political person(s); media personnel; teachers; professors; teenagers; and adults, regarding how this issue could affect the up and coming electoral session 2008 is discouraging. The opportunity for legislation to be changed is promising with this research. The challenge of representing millions with only a few words is daunting.